Monday, August 31, 2009

DISCOURAGED EMOTIONS...not defeated, just discouraged!

Since my last post, I have incurred many situations that have made me call to question most of my heart felt ideologies on what it would take to create an Africa so great, so vibrant and so self dependent. Now granted, on a regular I would stick to the issues, spew facts your way and have the motive of evoking serious thought in your righteously intelligent minds but today is different, its solemn, somber and I dare say, frightening! Today is the day I make a bold move and dare expose to the world my insecurities and fears surrounding my journey toward creating a better Africa.
Over the past month or two, I have had the privilege of sharing my ideas with major media entities and while it's been an absolutely great opportunity, it has come with it many questions that I may not have dared ask myself before. Questions on what ideas I have for the Africa I want to create and live in, questions on the ideal leadership roles and models, questions on ways to embrace change...all these I could answer without falsehood, without deterring and definitely with great spirit! The questions that caught me off guard were those asked of my own person, to what extent I would be willing to go in order to see my vision...strike that...our vision for Africa come to pass! As I thought more and more about the person that I am and the type of person it would take to create and sustain this Africa we long for, I began to wonder if I had what it takes to make and be the change that we want and deserve to see. I'm I ready for the sacrifice, I'm I ready for the hardships, do I have the tolerance, the perseverance, the resilience, the patience, and the intelligence... yes I said it, the intelligence it would take to play a part in getting OPERATION AFRICA going? I'm I deserving of such an opportunity?
These are some of the quandaries that seem to be holding me back...TEMPORARILY! And as I type this up, it suddenly dawns on me that the fire at the pit of my stomach burns more brightly than it has before, my mission for a better Africa remains ever so strong and I realize today I am discouraged but I am certainly NOT DEFEATED!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I would like to commend you for the passion you have for our beloved continent. Africa indeed is a great place. Full of diversity in both people and resources. But we have to make a clear distinction of the type of Africa we want. While i embrace change we should not erode the things that make us be who we are, Africans.

Allow me to focus on Africa not as the continent but the people. We are Africa, and the future of this land depends wholly on what we do now. The biggest obstacle towards africas growth is our Attitude and our fear to embrace change. Being scared to take up responsibility for our actions and not thinking of the future. Life is full of challenges. Of which some can be averted. In Africa we only live for the day. Tommorow always seems to take care of itself. We also need to stop relying heavily on the west.

i disagree with you when you talk of sacrifice, hard ships, tolerance and patience as some of the things required for a better Africa. Sometimes in life the greatest hurldes are overcome by the least expected things. In the early 60's, an American activist started a legacy. To secure civil rights and end racial discrimination in america. And this was driven by a dream he had. Maybe all we need in africa is to continue holding on to our dreams that indeed one day, this place will be what we've always wanted it to be.

Anonymous said...

I'd like to briefly respond to the writer of the comment above. The activist you speak of is recognized as a martyr by two Christian churches. Martyrdom- considered by many as the ultimate sacrifice.
Also the 1955 Montgomery Bus boycott he led resulted in the bombing of his house and his subsequent arrest so you might want to use a different example when furthering the argument that sacrifice, patience and tolerance are not necessary in the restructuring of Afrika.

Gigee most of us reading this blog already agree with most of what you’re saying. I think the challenge is to stop waiting for the big bang - the appointment to the United Nations, the MP nomination etc
Let's figure out what we can do right now.
I think you were on to something here:
“ Instead of mopping around, criticizing the outsider’s policies put in place for all issues "African", why not resolve our own conflicts?
How? Better education from the grassroots up! Vote wisely. Vote in accordance to your needs, your vision for your country...as opposed to voting in accordance to ethnicity, peer influence…”

But you didn’t develop that train of thought. Your next post was filled with self doubt.
"...do I have...the intelligence it would take to play a part in getting OPERATION AFRICA going?" In my opinion, this question is irrelevant because whether or not you and I have the intellect it takes, we're still going to try right? So we might as well be confident. And that, to me, is a complete circle of reasoning that eliminates self doubt.
But back to the idea that educated and informed voting is the key...
When you leave it like that, isn’t it similar to telling a beggar to make sure he has a balanced diet and sleeps in a warm dry place?
The majority of the Kenyan electorate is poor people who vote in accordance to their needs, their short term needs. They don’t have access to the information they need so as to make a truly informed decision.
So what can we do about that today? Let’s brainstorm on that.
My suggestion: I think it would be beneficial for example, to have a watchdog website for each constituency, maybe start with a few in Nairobi. And just clearly state the facts:
1. An MP’s voting record in parliament.
2. A detailed report on the CDF and a paper trail.
The nature of this information is very factual so difficult to manipulate.
Anyway, I could go on forever but I’m hungry lemme go kula lunch we’ll vibe later